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Sole Custody - The Best Custody Type for Your Family?
from:Annie Parron
Have you ever been so frustrated with your ex that you considered pursuing full custody? Before making that decision, you need to carefully consider the monetary and mental costs of battling for custody.
Two kinds of custody are referred to as sole custody. Sole legal custody means that one parent has full responsibility for any parenting decisions. Sole physical custody refers to the child living with one parent while generally having visitation with the other parent. You may want one or both of these types of custody.
The presumption in many courts is joint legal custody where both parents participate in decision making on behalf of their child.
This is due, in part, to research that shows the noncustodial parents who are able to parent their child are less likely to become absentee parents. Parents have joint physical custody if the child splits living time evenly between the two parent's homes.
Before a court will grant sole custody, there needs to be evidence that the other parent is unfit. Usually the noncustodial parent is granted visitation, and there are requirements for the other parent to provide information on the child's life such as education, medical and religious concerns.
Unless the other parent does not want to remain involved with the child, it is quite hard to convince a court to not allow a parent to see his or her child, even if there has been documented abuse to the child. A parent who is found to be unfit may be granted supervised visitation and given a court order to attend a treatment program with the eventual goal of increasing visitation and parental participation if the parent complies with the court's orders.
Sole custody is not a given in any situation. The judge is supposed to rule based on the best interests of the children.
But, your definition of best interests and the court's may vary widely.
Sole custody is more likely to be granted in specific situations. If a parent has abused the child, the other parent may receive sole custody. False abuse accusations have become more prevalent, so credible evidence of abuse will have to be provided. In fact, judges some judges have given full custody to the abuser in the belief that the other parent was making false statements to try to win custody.
Incarceration of a parent is sometimes enough reason to give sole custody to the other parent, particularly if the sentence is for a long period. Mental illness or abuse of substances may also be cause to give full custody to the other parent.
Domestic violence can sometimes cause the court to grant custody to the abused parent. But, judges may not consider a history of violence to be reason to deny legal custody if the children were not affected by the violence.
An absentee parent may give you an opportunity to get full custody, if the lacik of involvement isn't due to a legitimate reason such as serving in the military. When the ex finds out that you are trying to take away custody, he or she may become involved again in order to keep this from happening. Courts generally won't take away rights from a parent who wants to retain custody.
Before filing for sole custody, think about the costs involved.
From a financial perspective, your outlay could easily run into the tens of thousands. A long court fight is extremely stressful and could result in negative health effects for you. Your ex may use the children as weapons to get back at you which can cause emotional damage your kids. You may become the victim of violence from the ex or someone acting on his or her behalf.
Some exes will even kidnap the children.
Even if you share joint legal custody with your ex, you may be able to get some protection from a violent or vindicative ex.
Decision making authority could be split be areas such as one parent being responsible for school decision and the other parent being in charge of medical concerns. There are professionals called parenting coordinators that serve as the go between so that warring parents don't have to necessarily communicate with each other.
Think carefully before making a decision to file for sole custody. Unless you are in one of the situations described above where you have a good chance at winning full custody, the time and expense of a custody battle probably won't be worth it to you.
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